Leaning on my Five

Last week was a crazy week! I don’t even think I can list everything that happened, but I will go through a few highlights. My brother-in-law had to go to the emergency room because he was hurt while hunting, I had a doctor’s appointment, I’m starting to show some signs of my side effects coming back from my medicine, work has been flipped upside and spun all over the place, and my truck is broken. Again, these are the highlights, not everything.

What Happened?

Let’s be honest, we have all had bad weeks. Everything that happened last week, has happened before. I’ve always had bad luck with vehicles. Over the last few years, I’ve had more appointments than I can count. Everyone has moments when work is crazy. So why was last week different? I guess part of it might be that all these things happened within a few days of each other. The other part might be that it felt like I was getting hit from every possible angle. I really felt like every single weakness I have was being exposed. My health has been an issue for years, I keep saying I will change, but I haven’t. Having issues with my vehicle is only an issue because I’m just not where I should be financially. I’ve known for awhile that things at work would at some point need to be addressed, but I feel like I just kept putting things off, kicking it down the road. I feel like some how I didn’t see it, but I got to the end of the road. My head was down, I was focusing on so many things, I didn’t even see the road in front of me was about to end.

Slow and Clueless

The peak of all my craziness last week was Wednesday morning. That is when I woke up to the biggest issue and the most text messages. I was completely frozen for probably ten minutes. My wife was getting ready for work, but also trying to make sure I was ok. When I am not sure what I need to do, I start to pace. There I was, going through the whole house, driving my wife crazy, trying to figure out my next step. I needed to act, and I needed to act quickly, but I had no clue what to do.

When my World’s Collide

I know I have weird quirks, everyone does. One of my biggest quirks is that I like to keep work and home very separate. When I get home from work, I will tell my wife a little bit about work, but not a whole lot. She wants me to have a good night at work, but if things are ok, she doesn’t need all the small details. At work, I feel like it’s my job to check in with everyone else. I have people in my life who will listen to all my crazy stories, I understand that not everyone has that, so I will listen. Over the years that has turned into me just not talking about what I do outside of work. I tell people I hang out with my wife, watch baseball and sleep. When my wife is home, I don’t answer text messages about work or really even check my work emails. I never want my wife to feel like something else is more important than her. Wednesday morning, my worlds had to come together. I had to have a few work-related phone calls; I had to text message a few people. What was my wife’s reaction? She went in late to work to make sure everything was ok.

When the Pacing Stops

When I finally stopped pacing on Wednesday morning, this is what happened. The first thing that I did was pray. When you are completely lost and the people you love are hurting, you really only have one option. It’s too big for you to handle, you need help, stop and pray. Then I did something that I have been talking about for years. I leaned on my five. It started with my wife; I talked to her a lot that day. When the day was finally over, I realized that 95% of the people I interacted with that day were my five. When my week was finally over, I was completely exhausted, but I also knew that I couldn’t have done it without my five. Every time I turned around, I would go to them, or they would check in with me. I have no idea how this story is going to end for me or for everyone else, what I do know is that you need to make sure you have your five. This week my five listened to me, gave me advice, supported me, gave me comfort, told me things to keep me positive and got mad and hated people with me. I love my five very much and I hope they know that!